Monday, October 31, 2011


I'm lying in what appears to be a hospital bed with my legs and chest strapped down. It's been about four hours or so since I woke up and I don't remember how I got here or anything that happened since a week ago, when I fell asleep holding my girlfriend.

I know it's been a week becuase my phone and watch both say the same date. I managed to reach my phone and hold it up enough to type this, but I'm not sure anyone will get this message.

There's white walls on every side of me and I can make out a light on the roof, but it's off. The only light aside from my phone is coming from the screen suspended above me. It's horrible, but my eyes won't close or look away for longer than a few moments...just enough to slowly type this.

The screen shows another white room, but this one's upright. In the middle of the screen I can see it.

I'm not sure what it is, but it's not human. Its shape is humanoid, but it's definitely not human. Its skin is grey - pale beyond belief - and its hair is pitch black, haing down messily and covering half its face.

I've been lying here in silence since I awoke. My throat is dry, but I know I'm capable of sound. However, my mouth won't open and my voice won't sound. My fingers don't make a sound on the touch screen. All I've heard is my own breathing getting shallower and shallower. I might not have long left.

I opened my mouth to take a deep breath and the screen above me moved. It hadn't moved until I opened my mouth, but now it's standing there with its mouth held open, a pit of darkness that shadows themselves seem to ooze from.

Just like mine, its mouth stopped. I can hear it. Not from the screen, but from everywhere. It's whispering to me, not in its own voice, but every one I've ever heard. I can't make out any words that make coherent sentences, but it knows my name.

I shook my head and clenched my teeth to try to block it out and, as I stared up at the screen, it mimicked me, looking right into the camera. Its mouth was open with horrible, pointed teeth grinning at me. I can see its eyes...if I can even call them eyes. They shine like light, but it isn't light; it's pure darkness, an area void of light at all, looking straight into the camera at me.

A tear rolls down my cheek sideways and down its. It's not a tear of water, but something black and burning. Why can't I close my eyes?

I couldn't take it anymore. I started screaming, convulsing under my restraints. What happened stopped me dead after a moment. It didn't shake. It took a step closer to the camera. It isn't screaming, either. It's laughing through a gap in its jagged, pure white teeth. The voices all laugh as one and tears pour down both its face and my own.

At the top of my lungs, I scream as I shake, desperate to get escape this hellish torment. As my eyes focus on the screen, I see that it is gone. A tear of relief slides down my cheek. Next to my ear I hear a sizzling noise and black smoke is drifting up. I shift up my gaze, finaly free of the hypnotic screen, and the tears start silently again.

It's standing over me. Tears of darkest pitch drop down my face while the darkness of its eyes and mouth spreads.

Somebody help...


  1. "Somebody help," is an amazingly chilling way to end this one, I love it.

  2. .............. Seriously somebody help me.

  3. Okay? As someone who is easily scared by A LOT of things, this... I felt nothing from this :I

  4. "Hold on, let me finish typing" S-o-m-e-b-o-d. . . . . :)

  5. Was a hell of a text. What's his carrier?

  6. longest text ever

    more like mobile e-mail

    Reminds me of the John Creepypasta.

  7. Man i was fucking stoked to see this after not checking on the site for a while.I was in hospital when I wrote this, and yeah it could be better but oh we'll, sue me. I know I can't prove I actually wrote it except by showing a screenshot of the date I Last fixed it up (which I can do).

    And btw carrier is Telstra (Australia) :p

    Hope you liked it

  8. The 'thing' was in his room the entire time. It's 'another white room' but 'upright'. It was just watching him the entire time, mimicking him as it saw what he did. And when he finally snapped, it stepped forward off camera to finish him.

    As for the tears being a burning black liquid, if anyone has an idea of an actual scientific reason, that would only make me love the story more.

  9. Tears are very salty and ones skin might get sore.

  10. Maybe the girlfriend did it to him,Maybe she was a crazy girl who served the thing that mimmiced the boy ^^...I mean after all *) They did go to sleep Together Maybe she's behind it all -Ltb

  11. I thought the big reveal was going to be that he was looking into a mirror.

  12. ^ Yeah, same here.

    4/5 because it's good, but not great. Also, "typing my death tail".

  13. AN interesting idea but the execution is flawed. The poor choice of vocabulary made it difficult to see what's going on and there are several logical flaws too - like typing this sort of a huge text in that rather artistic fashion while strapped down and scared shitless. Seriously, how would he write an entire paragraph describing the monster that's standing RIGHT ABOVE him on his cellphone? Come on.

    Still, it's a good concept and also pretty scary.

    just kidding i just wanted to say one of those for once :P

    i also thought thought that the big twist was he was looking in a mirror. pretty creepy imagery. 4/5

  15. Not bad, good concept, maybe would have been a little better if it was choppier I guess? Like you were scared. Still good though.

  16. God dammit, your a typing master, man! Just grab it's face and start tappin' with your fingers, it's head's really gonna explode!

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