After his business failed and his wife left, a man decided to kill himself, but he wanted to be sure that eh wouldn't botch the operation. After some thought, he decided that hanging would be the bet method. He found a tree with a stout limb reaching out over the edge of a cliff 50 feet above the sea and chose his spot for the suicide.
Although he was eager to leave this world, he did not want to feel any pain. So he collected a few dozen sleeping pills. Of course, sleeping pills don't work immediately, and the man had read terrible stories of people who had taken half an hour to die at the end of a rope. He decided to shoot himself, too - jest to be on the safe side.
On the day he decided would be his last day, the man took the rope, the sleeping pills and the gun to the cliff. He swallowed the sleeping pills. He tied the rope to the branch and slipped the noose around his neck. He put the gun to his head and as he steeped off the edge of the cliff, he fired.
But the sudden drop threw off the man's aim. The bullet missed him completely and cut through the rope instead. The man plunged into the sea where he swallowed so much sea water that he vomited up the sleeping pills.
He swam ashore and resolved not to attempt suicide again.
This got a laugh outta me. This is a nice piece of retardant, thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteBasejumping without a parachute isn't as popular these days anymore now is it?
ReplyDeleteDidn't this actually happen?
ReplyDeleteAlso, Creepypasta flood, F Yeah.
A cool story, but i doubt it's true.Mainly do to the whole shooting through the rope thing.Mythbusters a did a full episode on that very thing.End results, a complete myth only seen in movies and stories.Back in the real world shooting a rope with a gun does not cut it.Just singes it at the point of impact while deflecting the bullet slightly off to the side if it's taunt enough, or moving out of it's way if hanging lose.How is that possible you may ask??Because you got to keep in mind that a bullet is a blunt object with no edge. No matter how fast it traveling it can't really "cut" what it hits just sorta break through, and rope simply has to many interwoven strands for that.It's essentially the same thing as a bullet proof vest just in a different form.
ReplyDeleteI think teh man is a pretty cool guy. Eh wanted to make sure "eh wouldn't botch the operation" and doesn't afraid of anything.
ReplyDeleteEven if this is supossed to be a joke, there is no excuse for the terrible spelling.
ReplyDeleteOh man, I remember this story from....well, it's pretty much been around forever.
ReplyDeleteAh the memories.
So hoboitup.. your saying we should use rope as bulletproof vests?
ReplyDeleteIf you covered your body in rope and found a way to keep them tied together.Then yes it would serve as a completely bullet proof vest.However that would be highly cumbersome and impractical.Hince why the military takes the same concept and makes it into a more Mobile,and lighter vest.All it is hundreds of thousands of tiny Kevlar stings criss crossed and woven together to form one super dense mesh.That serves a net to catch bullets and keep it from penetrating.A rope is just a bulkier more primitive form of the same thing.Thousands of individual stings woven together to form one super dense larger sting.
ReplyDeleteP.s this blog could really use a edit feature.Just realized i put "sting' instead of "string" throughout that whole thing and have no way of correcting it lol.
ReplyDeleteHobo, yes myth busters DID bust the myth however they were using what bags of sand to weigh down the ropes? He had missed his shot and hit the rope I'm sure the weight of the man would tear the rope apart.
ReplyDeleteTHEN WHO WAS THE SEA WATER?!?!?
ReplyDeletehobo_it_up, ummm stories online, unless they have works cited pages, don't need to make sense, you can right a story about how someone jumped off a cliff and went up instead, but i would prbly say thats defying gravity would'nt you? Calm down is basically what im saying, plz dont flame me or get mad :D
ReplyDeleteMy favorite song this just reminded me of it
ReplyDeleteI Set My Friends On Fire
Reese's Pieces, I Don't Know Who John Cleese Is
With a wire wrapped around his neck,
Tightly tied to a tree,
There he stood on the top of the cliff,
With his inanimate life, above the sea.
He drinks his virulent drink.
And sets himself on fire.
Pulls the trigger though the midair;
Misses his head and snaps the wire.
Now choking and strangling in the water,
His body begins to sink.
Not only did that put out the flames.
But he regurgitated his drink.
This wasn't the worse thing that could happen... yes it is.
We're dying slowing again... we're dying
Slowly again?
More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/i/i_set_my_friends_on_fire/#share
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He then walked back to his car, intending to begin living life to the fullest. He turned the key in the ignition and his car blew up.
ReplyDelete