Sunday, January 16, 2011

Dargaea's Nectar

If you ever find Dargaea's Nectar, you'll probably be one of the ones who have been looking for it all their lives, and thus won't need any instructions on what to do with it.

Just the same, it's pretty simple (at least to start with).Make sure your affairs are in order, in case you have a bad reaction, and then...? Bottoms up!

The coming months are the least pleasant part. You'll find yourself unable to keep food down long before you're far enough along to stop needing it. It's the same with sleep. The color of your blood will be off and your veins will consequently stand out more. Expect a few in-grown body parts; it'll be little things, like fingers and ears and teeth, pressing up against the skin. Make sure you're caught up on your booster shots because youre never going in for a check-up again...or wearing anything more revealing than a trench coat in public, most likely.

Eventually, a little cut on your belly will start 'unhealing,' becoming a puss-filled wound in a few days. Over the coming week, three things will emerge from this:

The first object resembles a greasy black beechnut with maybe a tooth or two growing from it. When you're dead, someone will eventually find it and use it to make a new batch of Dargaea's Nectar. Hide it well to make things fun for future generations.

The second object basically looks like a softball-sized cluster of veins, many of them broken and leaking black stuff, and all wrapped around something. It'll squirm and you'll notice the twisted little skinless fetus in the middle. It will only survive for about twenty seconds. Burn the remains.

The third object will--

...well, let's just call it 'object 3.' It's easier that way.

You can plant it anywhere you want. I advise some place where you don't mind spending all your time and no one else would go. Your backyard or under your cellar works if you don't have any roommates; just as long as there's fertile soil. Dig at least five feet down. It won't want to be buried, but just keep piling dirt onto it. If you can still hear it when you're finished, you didn't go deep enough.

Its veins (or roots, I guess) will eventually spread in all directions about a foot-and-a-half for every year of your life. Grass and weeds will grow stiff and body, black and oily, or take on the color and texture of a spider bite or rice paper. Wood will be infected, too; you'll hear the arteries in your walls pulsing on quiet nights. The ground will rot with dead insect and animal life. Don't mow your lawn; it bleeds like hell.

This is your sanctuary.

No matter what threats or injuries beset you outside, here you will be safe and healthy...or, what appses for 'healthy' for you now. If you really hate someone, bring them here. Trick them into coming. They'll get infected one way or another - a lungful of spore, a thornprick, a bit of residue on their hand... They will vomit blood that has tiny centipedes in it. They'll shit out their own spinal fluids. Their eyes will milk over and hatch; little spines and brambles will grow from the sockets. They'll survive for months or years and doctors will be baffled. It will be fucking great.

That's just for starters. You'll learn more as you go. Much more. But if I told you everything now, you might not do it.

Whatever you do, just guard the third object with your life, with your very soul. If you think you're in danger of losing it, dig it up, kill it with a silver needle; let someone else make a new one someday. You'll feel as if you've pierced your own heart, but it's better than letting it fall into the wrong hands.

Because you're a Holder now.

And you'd better not let them come together.


  1. NASTY.
    Good pasta.

  2. Does this go along with that Holder Series?

  3. well written but not my kind of pasta

  4. It does go along with the Holders, but I don't think I've seen it on there.

  5. Yeah, it's there. "The Holder of the First Seed", or Object 448. Also, there's a "Holder of the Second Seed", which adds a creepy kind of tie-in.

  6. "It'll be fucking great". I loved this line. Applause.

  7. what's dargaea's necter?

  8. i think i found this thing. my pagan friend who likes weird stuff gave it to me.

    i'm not sure weather to drink it

  9. In a genetics class I took in college, we learned about teratomas, these placental...tumors (more or less) caused by mitosis error that lead to all 46 chromosomes being provided by the mother.

    They're basically lumps of flesh with teeth and hair and bones in them. I thought of them the second I read this.

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  11. This story always makes me laugh, actually. Love it.

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  15. O.O this story actually scared me kinda.
    Makes little sense, but its great!