Since before I can remember, I've wanted to be a mother. It seemed my whole childhood and teenager years were spent yearning for a child of my own. By the time I was nine, I had names and color schemes for the nursery picked out. All I needed was someone to make them with. But college was disappointing. I went through a while string of bad boyfriends and bad father material.
Getting on with my career didn't seem to help much. I realized, though, when I was twenty-seven - and there were no suitable prospects on the line - that, technically, I didn't need a man to have a child with. I found a sperm donor bank, chose the best prospect they had, got out my turkey baster and...well...hoped for the best.
I was overjoyed when my first pregnancy test came out positive. My doctor was surprised to see me coming in sooner than he'd expected. Before I was four weeks along, I had the nursery painted and the furniture set up. Toys and diapers, bottles and books, bibs and coveralls...I had everything a new mother would need.
I couldn't explain all the wait I was losing, however. I kept getting thinner - everything except for my belly. My friends all joked that it had to be at least twins, or the biggest baby they'd ever seen.
I got weary of the kicking somewhere in the third trimester...and the scratching.
Just one more week until my due date.
I just wish it would stop gnawing.